When it comes to fashion, I’ve seen it all—including, but never limited to, men in chinchilla fur, ostrich feathers and the occasional pair of opaque tights and Jimmy Choo ankle booties. But just because I live in the San Francisco Bay Area doesn’t mean I can’t maintain my belief that men should dress like men.
I have also extended this rather old fashioned “dress your part” philosophy to include babies and puppies. In the event I am a proud mother to either someday, I vow never to outfit them in sinfully sexy “big people” ensembles: Marabou-embellished headbands, rhinestone collars, jewelry, miniature denim, and high heels are off limits.
That’s right, I said high heels because in case you haven’t heard, there is such a thing as baby’s first high heels, produced by a company called Heelarious. Granted, these are not made for walking—they’re soft to the touch and simply designed to look like high heels for crawlers ages 0-6 months. They come in six styles, which span precocious zebra stripes and leopard prints, as well as solid black and hot pink options for, um, more conservative wee ones. The finishing touch? A purse-shaped gift box.
Since these are essentially novelties marketed to shoe-loving grown-ups, I’ll withhold my criticisms. However, I’m curious to find out if these actually aspire to make a chubby munchkin’s legs look longer and leaner, and if I can look forward to seeing any babies (and that includes little boys) actually wearing the things.