Looking to step out in style this year? Shoetube.tv presents the top fashion (and beauty) resolutions every woman must make for 2009.
Resolution #1: Buy one hot new pair of stilettos to commemorate the New Year. Wear them on an even hotter date who is capable of carrying you when said stilettos prove too tall to walk like a normal human being.
Resolution #2: Never let ‘em see your bra straps. Even if they are Dior.
Resolution #3: Never throw away any accessory or item of clothing in your closet, especially anything so out it’s about to make a comeback.
Resolution #4: Never call a girlfriend to ask what she’ll be wearing to an event, only to show up in the exact same outfit.
Resolution #5: Always stock up on comfortable, unsexy flats for sanity’s sake.
Resolution #6: Always carry a supply of Band-Aids in case said flats rub you the wrong way. Even unsexy shoes have been known to cause unnecessary pain and suffering.
Resolution #7: Always wear cute pajamas that pass as street clothes in case of disaster, like a house fire or last-minute brunch invitation (most likely to strike when the contents of your closet are strewn all over the floor.)
Resolution #8: Never underestimate the power of a push-up bra when it comes to weaseling your way to the head of a long line.
Resolution #9: Dress with care when headed to the gym/supermarket/drug store. You never know when you’ll run into an ex.
Resolution #10: Fishnet stockings are off-limits in public, unless it’s Halloween.
Resolution #11: Stockings with runs in them are off-limits in public at all times.
Resolution #12: Rely on oversized sunglasses a la Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen on days when you can’t muster the strength to put on makeup.
Resolution #13: Never sleep in your makeup, no matter how pooped or drunk you are.
Resolution #14: Never buy anything you have to shimmy, wriggle or squat your way into.
Resolution #15: Never let a shoe wear you.
Resolution #16: Always go shopping looking your worst. If an item still looks good, you simply have to have it. No ifs, ands or buts.
Resolution #17: Never let good friends borrow your good clothes unless you want to lose both.
Resolution #18: Keep all receipts in a water- and fire-proof place lest you change your mind.